What do you do when you see a funeral procession? www.giftsforangels.co.uk

A question I always want to ask people is this
" what do you do if you see a Hearst with a sometimes long procession of cars following it?"
Befor Lola died, I would never over take such a procession if for instance it was on a dual carriage way... But I very rarely would acknowledge one, that may have been passing me as iwalked along a busy street! That's the truth and I feel ashamed to admit it.
The morning of Lola' funeral was by all accounts a big blur... The undertakers coming to take her from her bedroom, my husband and his brothers insisting that they carried her, me leaving her room before they closed........ ( I can't bring myself to say the next line let a lone type it, but you get the general idea). I remember looking at the car and walking around it, don't ask me why but did. Sitting in the car behind I was watching in disbelief the car in front as it pulled away taking my baby girl from her beautiful home for the very last time. Much more is a a blank but what really stands out is I was intently watching all the other cars that passed us, and when we drove into the centre of "Hove" it was busy with people going about their business.... The cars had to turn off a very busy street ( church rd) to drive to the church where the service was going to be held, as the car turned not 1 person out of the 50+ people in that street stopped, or made the sign of the cross or did anything!!!! I wanted to get out & scream at these selfish people , they didn't even notice the small white ...... That was in there very reach. How could people be so Unobservant, so dismissive, so disrespectful of what they were witnessing? It was very clear that it was a child and yet not 1 person did anything. It must haven only been 2 minutes but I was transfixed on all these people thinking
" someone will notice" but no, nobody did, they didn't care that that was someones whole world in that car, my whole world. Much was the same on the way back except for one man. He was walking up another busy road with a child on a scooter and caring another child who was clearly having a tantrum... He was busy but I never forget the look on his face as he glanced to his left and saw that first car & as he looked away he did a double take in utter disbelief.... His look was of shock and immense sadness... This one man in that 3 maybe 4 seconds restored a bit of my faith in the human race. In all that time 1 person stopped and looked and expressed the human emotion that I wanted, I needed and that I felt Lola deserved.
Now when ever I see a Hearst I stop just for a second acknowledge the procession and make the sign of the cross. So please I erg you all, even if your not religious just stop and show some respect to the dead and to their loved ones, it only takes seconds out of your life, but the memory I have of that one man will last a lifetime.
http://www.giftsforangels.co.uk

Bereaved Mothers www.giftsforangels.co.uk

Hello All and Happy New Year, sorry I don't seem to be able to manage to write regularly any more, I do it when I feel inspired, stressed or just fed up! To day it is inspiration that brings me to my keyboard. With all the pain I go through as a bereaved parent means I can be of some use to others in my situation. I am further along with my grief and I was recently asked a very honest question from another bereaved mother,
" does it get easier?" And my answer was
"Yes". Life has away of bending to the traumas it throws at us. I honestly said that the pain does not leave you, nor would you want it to.... This pain is your scar, a reminder of your greatest gift & loss. A scar that you learn to hide, not because of others but so you can get up and meet the demands of each and every day. You are never the same person after experiencing such sadness, you are not a complete person anymore a party of you is missing. If for instance you had your right hand amputated, you would have to learn to do everything with your left hand.... It would be hard but you would have very little choice. In a similar way grief gives you no choice but to learn to live a different way.
Sometimes when I have these email/ phone conversations with other Mums in my position, it amazes me how easy it is. We have a mutual vulnerability a complete understanding of each other and yet we have never met, I have no idea about their general life, what their husband does for a living, where they were brought up and yet I am at ease in there company speaking to them about the most personal part of my life. We know so little about each other but we are drawn together because of the unspeakable agony that we all live with. Many of our usual friends will try to understand our pain but they never can & as time goes on people stop asking, but once someone has walked your path they understand and will always understand in 2 years or 22 years they will still get it!  We are not alone, and sometimes that's all we need to hear.
My love & strength I send to you all my friends , who knows maybe one day we may all actually meet!
www.http://www.giftsforangels.co.uk

Gifts for Angels & You Magazine Sunday November 24th 2013

Website of the week:giftsforangels.co.uk

Michelle Rice’s little daughter Lola died of a brain tumour in 2006. The sadness of visiting her grave was compounded by the lack of grave ornaments that were ‘bright, beautiful and fun – like Lola’, as well as durable and inexpensive, so Michelle started this website to give her family and others ‘a little piece of comfort’. Find funky cherubs (£21.99), coloured stone vases (£16.99) and handmade seed cards (£4.50) in this small, sweet range.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/you/article-2510507/Health-This-weeks-issues-advice.html#ixzz2lhCC2dRk 

Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

Was so please with our write up from the very lovely "Sarah Stacey" at The Daily Mails "You Magazine" We have been really busy with orders since, happy? yes, but it is always a double edge sword! http://www.giftsforangels.co.uk

Grief at Christmas time www.giftsforangels.co.uk

So I have decided to do a small Christmas range, this consists of Gold & silver grave vases and personalized Christmas tree baubles. While the reaction has been lovely, I'm constantly aware of people's opinions. For instance my lovely photographer is always worrying about my products been photographed looking "too cool/beautiful" and I have to constantly remind her that this is what I want as a bereaved parent. Another friend is worried that by me promoting

my Christmas range, it's too, "in your face" ( her words, not mine) .... It's hard to know what is acceptable when advertising it on FB and twitter..
.. " you don't want to look like your making money from people's grief"  was another persons comment.
While I do make a small profit on My products, I am also trying to support the charity "Brain Tumour research", and most of all I started this whole thing for me, it was always about something I could have to put down for My Lola. Why could I not make her grave side look pretty? Especially on her Birthday.... And now Christmas. Every year I have a bag of Christmas ornaments that I place at her grave side. Now I am over the moon by the fact that I have gold & silver vases that I can fill with Holly and hang little decorations from the branches. So please believe me when I say, "Yes, it does make me happy" , to know that after I have finished decorating my tree at home with my other children I can then go to the cemetery and decorate Lola's & my Dad's grave side and this is the exact feeling I want to be able to offer to other bereaved people.
Christmas is a lovely time of year, but also a very hard & difficult time for any person who has Lost a loved one. Knowing that I can't celebrate it with my beautiful eldest daughter and my wonderful Dad, is the worst feeling in the world and Nothing can take this away, but I do get some comfort from knowing I can decorate their grave sides, and on Christmas morning when we go down to the cemetery their grave's are looking festive and lovely, this helps Me..... That is why I do what I do, I am not a Saint, I'm not a business woman I am simply a bereaved Mother & Daughter, trying to cope the best way I know how.
Any comments would be much appreciated.

www.giftsforangels.co.ukhttps://www.giftsforangels.co.uk

My birthday. www.giftsforangels.co.uk

 Last month was my 38th Birthday.... God it seems much older when you type it! Anyway as much as I haven't look forward to a Birthday since Lola died, I have been able to enjoy the last few and managed to celebrate and genuinely smile and have fun. This year as I sat on my bed and anticipated the stampede of my children bursting in with cards etc, I thought how fast the last 10 years had gone. I remember very clearly being 28 and it took me back to remember how perfect my life was then..... It was only 10 years ago, but Lola was alive and well, as we're my Mother & Father-in-law ( who I loved both dearly, like my own) and of course my Father was alive too. It struck me that in a mere 10years I had lost the most important people in my life,it didn't seem real or fair.... I wasn't 88 years old!!!!  That life feels like a lifetime ago, I was a different person. I didn't have to try to be happy, life was not such an effort I was perfectly happy.... And I probably didn't realize it! Do you ever get that feeling when you are in real physical pain.... Like tooth ache or tummy ache... Thinking I wish I just felt normal, why didn't I appreciate not having these pains before? I know it sounds crazy but I can't remember feeling normal,I over analyze everything, I question myself more now than ever before, I'm like a magnet to any depressing book or movie dispute being upset by the silliest of things. Recently I applied to that amazing website
"Notontehighsreet.com" because I thought it would be fantastic if they could stock some of the Gifts for Angels range, I knew it was a risk.... But after the reaction I have had from my customers I thought it was a huge market that they have not yet tapped into. Of course it was a very polite no thank you!!!! It upset me because I no they thought "o no, too sad, too depressing, don't want to be associated with death" yet because of how big they are, they are exactly the people to get my products to those that really need them. It's this attitude that makes people like me feel alone, after all  anything that brings a small amount of comfort in grief will always be welcomed with open arms..... Trust me I know.http://www.giftsforangels.co.uk



http://www.giftsforangels.co.uk

Lola's up and coming Birthday

So this week end will be Lola's 10th Birthday, I sit here and imagine what I would be doing, of course organising her Party which would be on the Saturday at My Mums house, swimming in her pool. John would be doing the BBQ and I would now be busy organising food and drink and party bags, do 10yr olds have party bags? would this be a party she wanted or would she prefer a more grown up cinema and dinner party? who would she invite? these questions have been flying around in my mind now for the last couple of weeks. I always try and make my children's parties special I make a really big deal out of them, and I really think its because I thought I would have so many more with Lola and I didn't. I feel cheated! I feel angry with myself that her last ever Birthday party, her 2nd, was held the day after my Husbands & Sister in laws 40th, and consequently there were a lot more people there than She knew, it turned into something I didn't want but at the time I didn't see it as a big deal! I wish it had just been family, her best friend Harry, cousin Keira and her new baby sister - Ava. I can't believe she will be 10 years old, I last saw her when she was just 2years 8months, I want so badly just to have a small incite into the person she would have become, to see her laugh one more time, play with her sisters, have a conversation, tell me what she wants for dinner, silly things like this would make me the happiest person in the world !I know this can never happen and it breaks my heart even more. My new neighbours who I am very good friends with have their daughter's birthday party on the Saturday, I don't know what to do, my girls will enjoy it, but the guilt of being at another child's birthday party will be so hard and being neighbours its very hard to avoid!
My youngest Daughter is now 2years 11 months, I recently looked through some of Lola's things that I had kept, all her little socks now fit Lila-Bleu and some of her knickers too. I was never able to open this case when my other 2 were little but I am glad I did it this week. Each little pair of socks has a small memory that makes me smile and remember how gorgeous and yummy Lola was, she was my little shadow, we were together all the time. She was my first child and I never thought I could love someone as much as I loved her.....

http://www.giftsforangels.co.uk    

Faith, Religion & Reality - www.giftsforangels.co.uk

I have joined various groups over the years, on FB or memorial websites like Gonetoosoon. I have found comfort in being surrounded by other peoples grief, when I say comfort I mean these groups are a place where I feel comfortable.Reading how others have lost their children, how they cope with their grief and how they struggle with their lives at times makes me feel less alone. I have noticed that many of my "American Friends"on these sites have a huge amount of faith. In a way I am envious of this, as since Lola died I have been battling a lot with my faith and God! I was raised a catholic and have also put my girls into a catholic school and when Lola first died I went to church more, and although I was angry with God for taking her, I new she was safe now and with him. As much as I still believe in God, I am drawn further away from the catholic religion and its hypocrisy. I have lost faith in the Priests with the bad press that surrounds them, so many Paedophiles too many to ignore. Isn't it funny how you are brought up to believe something and for years and years you do so just because you were once told to! If you actually stop and consider things how many of us would change it ? As I chose to send my children to a catholic school I find myself in church far more than I would like. On Sunday we were at the Holy Communion of our friends daughter, and as I sat their and listened to the Priest's sermon (which as a child & young adult I never did!) almost everything he said I either questioned or disagreed with. Now I do believe in God, I believe in heaven and I believe that when we die we all go there, I believe in the saints and angels but beyond that I am not sure. I am not nor have I ever been inspired when I go to church, should this not be so? Loosing Lola has opened my eyes more than I would have liked , you see the imperfections in the world in HD, Death becomes a reality, nothing surprises you, and the phrase,  "It'll never happen to me",  is obsolete.

Please note these are My opinions and My feelings, I do not wish to offend anyone.

www.giftsforangels.co.uk  in memory of My Angel, Lola Rice - Unique Grave side ornaments that are Bright & Beautiful just as she was, for a free brochure you can contact me via the website x

My perfect Lola above, http://www.giftsforangels.co.uk and Precious Plaque grave side ornament available in other styles x